Expert Tips

After the Aisle: 3 Ways to Set Boundaries In Your Marriage

*Featured image by Jakob Owens on Unsplash

By Keisha Bass of Her Dope Marriage

Sis, don’t let others’ opinions threaten the health of your marriage.  Learn to tune out the noise. This can sometimes be challenging especially when the other people are friends and family. They have opinions on what should happen and how it should happen.  They mean well, but often, their opinions can sometimes cause issues in your relationship.  

Here are a few ways to protect both you and your husband:

1. Set boundaries. 

They are not only important in your relationship, but also important for the people around you. Creating healthy boundaries limits the amount of interference.  It is something that you must both do together.  This can be challenging especially if you were raised in a close family environment.  

Negotiate what you think is best for you both.  You get to decide who you allow into your marriage but be careful not to overly share because that then gives them an invite. You have to gently insert yourself and take a firm stand on what matters most to you- your marriage.  

2. Maintain a united front. 

Get rid of the tendency to side with anyone other than your spouse. This was stated above but worth repeating, you get to decide who you allow into your marriage even if you and your husband are upset with one another.  

It’s easy to pull people into your marriage when you experience challenges, but regardless, maintain that unified front.  If you are going over to a family member’s house and you are not talking to your husband, don’t invite family in by sharing the details about what’s going on. (Disclaimer: abuse must be shared).

3. Limit the influence of others. 

Decide the amount of influence you will allow. Not all influence is bad, but you do need to be cautious on what you allow or not allow in marriage.  The images and pictures that we see on social media can be a distraction and influence what we do or don’t do in our marriage.  Use wisdom when looking to those that look like everything is going well.

Keisha Bass is the Founder and CEO of Her Dope Marriage, a platform dedicated to providing wives with wise counsel and advice, as well as strategies for becoming a wife of purpose and intentionality. Get more marriage tips and find out more on IG: @her.dope.marriage and at www.herdopemarriage.com.

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